Insanity

I count the tiles

on the floor of the bathroom

in which I sit anxiously trying to catch my breath

one hundred thirty five

I count the scratches

on the mirror

that does not even begin to reflect

what’s real

sixteen

I count the number of times

your name flashes through my mind

in a single second

two hundred twenty seven

I reach my hand out

to get a taste of truly living

bitter

only to learn I’m just out of reach

the only thing that lingers on my tongue

is the taste of your love

sweet

I grasp onto the only thing I’ve ever known

Insanity

and in this twisted of living

you’re here

you’re fucking toxic

but the way you fill my veins

makes me feel so god damn alive

I am a maze

I am a puzzle

I am psychotic

once you’re in there’s no escaping

because i hold onto things a little too tight

now you can’t breathe

my shaking bruised hands wrap around your pale throat

try to find your way out baby

you’ll never leave

I hold on tighter each time you tug

now you’re dying

oh how lovely you look

gasping for air

I am a puzzle

only I know how to be completed

but it amuses me to watch you try

and fit the pieces together

I am psychotic

I am a reflection of every nightmare I have awoken from

I count the tiles

on the bathroom floor in which I sit

one..two..three..